Imports and Exports

This has been a very interesting time for me.

Have you ever become so fed up with the world, that you just wished it all went away? That's how I've been lately. absolutely completely mood swinging from super happy to supper gloomy. I've found myself doubting everything, and to be honest, I still haven't come up with the correct answer.

I know you all are probably reading this saying "The correct answer is no doubts," well, that's not going to work for me this time. I need proof to correct my doubts, and set me straight again.

Unfortunately, that's harder than it should be for me.

But I'm working on it.

I guess I'm feeling extra-open today, so I thought I'd share something with you. For those of you who know my TEC story, you know that I've battled with depression and suicidal thoughts before, thats a good deal of why I'm so in-the-fight now, against it.

I want to show you all my vulnerability right now. It's a blog, much like this one, with one exception. It's not. I made this blog as a coping mechanism for my depression, and it's not wide-spread. It's had 2 other visitors aside from myself, ever.

Some things to notice. Not all of it is first-hand experience, not all of it is original. I quoted books and songs quite a bit. There is a really interesting original poem in there somewhere that's all me. But it expresses my inner feelings at the time, and sometimes now-a-days.

Keep in mind that it's the past, it's before I found faith, and learned about real friends. Don't pity me, just get a clue on where we come from :) I'd suggest starting at the very bottom, and reading up - as that's how it's written.

For I have Known this Darkness

Peace and Prayers,
Jake