It's Really Dark In Here

Hey guys. It feels like it has been forever since I have posted! So, I have been feeling pretty low lately. You know that feeling where you need a hand up, but it feels like nobody could ever understand how things are really going for me. Maybe I have just been stressed out because of the school year coming to an end, or the fact that I go to a really difficult college, or just because life is hard in general. But I have been at the bottom of the barrel and life has been dark lately.

I am reminded of a story from the Gospels. Jesus had just finished preaching near the Sea of Galilea, and he told his apostles to go on ahead of Him. So they got in a boat and ROWED FOUR MILES across the Sea. (That is an insanely long way to row a boat, ya’ know.) But then, it gets even harder! A storm rose up, and tossed the boat like crazy. That is the place I find myself right now. It's extremely dark. I feel like I have been working at this life forever and haven't gotten anywhere. Now, a big storm is rising up in my soul, and Jesus isn't there to help me up. At least, that's what it feels like. I wish he would come to me just like He did for the disciples. 'Cause the story goes that Jesus came walking across the sea to the boat, and told them not to be afraid. They were afraid. They didn't even recognize Jesus in their crazed stupor. So, I thought, maybe we don't recognize Jesus when He comes to us either. He may be reaching out His hand to catch me as I fall, and I may just be blowing Him off like a ghost or a dream, or something. If God is holding me, I wish I could feel the warmth of His hand…